Thursday, February 24, 2011

Everyone needs a good laugh!!

*** Adult Truths ***
{I received this in an email}
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clearyour computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when yourealize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I wasyounger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm prettysure I can get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how theperson died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? Idon't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asksme if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report thatI swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know notto answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday orSaturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you justnod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word theysaid?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teamup to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong,brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never getdirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and stillnot know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their carkeys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail onthe Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze buttonfrom 3 feet away, in about 0.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, everytime, when it's pitch dark.
24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
Hope you enjoyed :)

2 comments:

susan dayley said...

I'm reposting excerpts from your Adult truths. Dad and I laughed out loud several times.

Amy said...

This was seriously funny, thanks for sharing!